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Several times a day I hear the theme song from If You Are the One, the hit Chinese dating show, blaring from my co-worker’s cell phone: It’s an embarrassing techno mix with a man’s voice wailing, "Can you feeeeel it?!

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Most of the time, though, he was angry and disappointed because I was not attracted to him if he dressed in women's clothes.I also offered to divorce him, but he wanted to stay in the marriage, and our children adored him.I am a senior citizen now; my husband passed away a couple of years ago.He eventually stopped being angry because his health declined and he was not really able to have sex.I realized that dating is hard and dating with vaginismus is even harder.If you’re someone who is rather shy about your condition or hasn’t been able to reach out and speak to your peers about vaginismus, I suggest you begin there.

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