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Validating statements communication

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Gaslighting is a great demonstration of invalidation. This is the gaslighting part of what I was unintentionally doing to my wife.

Counselors use the expression “gaslighting” to describe efforts to gradually manipulate someone into doubting his or her own reality or to trick a person into believing he or she is insane. Sadly, I'm sure I've sent the message to Erin that not only were her feelings wrong, but there was something wrong with her.

This article by Cliodhna O’Connor originally appeared on the LSE Impact of Social Sciences blog as “’Brain Study Confirms Gender Stereotypes’: How science communication can fuel modern sexism” and is reposted under the Creative Commons license (CC BY 3.0).

These biases in the scientific conduct of many sex difference studies are compounded when the research enters wider society.

Validation is an opportunity to communicate that your spouse's heart and emotions are important to you, regardless of whether you agree or they make sense to you. " • "You are not being rational." • "It's nothing to get upset over.

When you validate your spouse, you recognize, value and accept his or her deepest thoughts, opinions, ideas, beliefs and emotions. You shouldn't let it bother you." • "You should be over that by now." That is a pretty sobering list.